A Thanksgiving holiday can sometimes be stressful. All of the preparation, family and cooking can become burdensome to anyone involved. But what about when you aren’t cooking, prepping food or even home at all? What if you are away from the hustle and bustle relaxing at your girlfriend’s parent’s ranch? Well let me tell you, my Thanksgiving holiday weekend of 2017 was very stressful for me. It was a day that had been played out in my mind for weeks leading up to the infamous sleepy holiday weekend. You see it was a day in which I had planned to somehow work up enough courage to ask April’s dad for her hand in marriage.
In the time we had spent together as boyfriend and girlfriend I had been told many times that her dad was feared by boys growing up. He was a very protective and strict father, for good reason. These very stories had me on the fence of approaching him to talk about what had been on my heart. The days passed by and time was running out. Finally, on a calm Saturday evening I seized what seemed to be my only chance to talk to him alone. As I began to spill my heart I was able to feel the tension in the air. But never was there any judgement. There wasn’t anger or opposition in any way at all. I can honestly say that I know for a fact God had prepared both of our hearts for this exact moment. He was able to fully understand my love and commitment for not only his daughter, but for his two grandsons as well. Aside from the obvious concerns any father would have such as love, commitment, protection and providing for the family, his biggest concern was my commitment and heart for God. We talked all about God and the tension was lifted. Where was the bear she talked about? Where was the father that scared guys away? I certainly felt as if I dodged all of this and asked a father who was kind and accepting. Lucky me!!!!
Now that I had his blessing it was on to ring shopping and planning how I would propose. I knew if I were to find the perfect ring I would need to invest in some help from my two sisters. Shortly after the trip was over the hunt began. We went from store to store looking at diamond after diamond. I am pretty sure they both enjoyed seeing shiny rings on their hands and quite possibly even got a bit sidetracked! They both had many suggestions and favorites they swore were the perfect ring. But in the end I decided to follow my gut. I had known what style diamond and band she liked, but that just wasn’t good enough for me. Against my original pick I decided on a diamond that was the same style she loved, yet a special cut that was rare to find. For me this matched exactly how I felt about April. She was a one in a million woman, absolutely unlike anyone I have ever known and I wanted to spare no expense in letting her know exactly how I felt about her. This was the perfect ring for my perfect girl! To add to the pressure I had my heart set on proposing before the end of the year so I let the guys at the shop know that I would haunt their dreams if they couldn’t provide the perfect finished product by “X” date!
The last part of the whole equation was planning the perfect proposal. I knew that I wanted it to be natural and very personal. Somewhere that was meaningful to the both of us. That place would wind up being the house we bought together with our crazy confidence in our relationship and where it would be going. Oh little did she know. Before I could even begin to plan the perfect night I had to take care of one thing. I had already asked her father for her hand in marriage but that wasn’t good enough. This relationship was unlike most. It involved two of her kids and two from me. But her two boys had lost their dad and this changes the make up of a young boy. Her oldest had taken the role of protector, leader and the man of the house. He was very protective and attached to his mom. I knew that it would be a long, long road in gaining full trust and having a thriving relationship with him. But I also knew that talking to him and gaining his permission just as I did her father was a must for me. So I took him out one night and laid it all on the table, hoping he would understand my love for his mom and for him and his brother. To my surprise he was ok with it. It took a long conversation and reassurance of many, many things but he came around. We made a pact and I promised that he would be able to be a part of any planning of the proposal if he wanted.
Finally, I felt as if all boxes were checked and planning could be kicked in to high gear. Once again I enlisted the help of my sister and one of April’s best friends. I knew that if I was going to keep this infamous night a secret from her it had to feel and seem like any other night we have had. Well in advance I decided to plan a date night where we would get a sitter for her boys and go out to dinner. It would be that exact time when these two amazing women would step in and transform our barren backyard in to the most beautiful and amazing scene for what would be the most perfect proposal. When I mention a “barren” backyard I mean an empty bachelor pad. You see even though we bought a house together we had promised to continue to live separately until we were married, even if we had not been engaged. I guess this just showed the confidence we had in our relationship. It was extremely important to the both of us that we not only talked to our kids about God, but that we also lived this out. For us that meant living separately until marriage to obey God’s word for man and woman. This would become one of the best decisions we made thus far in our relationship. Needless to say my sister and April’s good friend had their work cut out for them transforming this empty backyard in to a romantic setting. I had many things I bought and wanted incorporated but little did I know these two super heroes would do much, much more.
The night approached and we left for our dinner date a city away. As soon as we left the two amazing women were hard at work. We ate and talked about life and our relationship and how we thought things were going thus far. Little did she know our night would end quite a bit different from what she was expecting. Right before I was about to get the check and head home I decided to text the girls. I got an all caps text back and it read as follows- “STALL”. My palms were beginning to sweat as I put in to motion operation “STALL”. Finally, we took the check and began what would feel like the longest drive home. I parked the car and unlocked the front door. She immediately noticed a dining room chair out of place with a scarf hanging over it. As she paused I grabbed the scarf and blind folded her. I told her to wait as I bolted to the backyard to start the song I had chosen for us. I led her to the backyard and as her back was turned to all of the decorations I untied the scarf. We began to dance to Russell Dickerson’s “Yours”, all the while only my eyes could see the amazing set up of our backyard. As we danced and reached the end of the song I turned her to all that the girls had set up for us. She paused, gasped and said “what the heck”. She held back tears as I poured my heart out to her and walked her to an amazingly beautiful center piece that held up the ring I had chosen not too long ago. Yes, this means I did not have to haunt the poor guys form Baron’s Jewelers. After what seemed like a week she finally got over the “fainting goat” syndrome and grabbed the ring while exclaiming YES!!! That was it. I had finally secured our future with what is one of the best days in my life. Of course as soon as things settled and emotions calmed she asked how in the heck I did all of this. I told her I enlisted the help of my sister and her friend, who were both still sitting in their car right outside of the backyard. She called them both into the backyard and we all laughed, cried and talked until the night would eventually come to an end. As excited as we both were, we knew that now we had to share the news to not only our friends and family, but to most importantly our own kids…
