Read Part One Here
Throughout my life and especially over the last three years God has proven himself over and over again to be more than faithful. Even though my darkest and most challenging times He has performed numerous miracles and knocked my socks off with blessing after blessing.
So when the doctors told me I had a 4% chance of getting pregnant through the In-Vitro Fertilization (IVF) process I definitely felt discouraged at first. Ultimately, I knew my God was bigger than any percentage or statistic I was given.
A year ago, David and I decided that we would begin the long process of IVF and see where it leads us. There are multiple steps in the process and we knew God would either open or close doors for us throughout our journey to be a family of 7.
With each step and even to the doctors’ surprise we would receive good news and our percentage rate of success would ever so slightly increase.
As the months went on the appointments, blood tests, ultrasounds, and shots became more frequent. All of this eventually led up to multiple procedures of egg retrieval, fertilization period, freezing embryos, genetic testing and implantation.
God was faithful and He proved the doctors wrong each step of the way.
There were many times through out this process that I wanted to give up because I didn’t think I was strong enough to continue. At one point I was giving myself 7 shots a day. I was sore, bruised, sick and emotional. It definitely takes a toll on your body. Then I had to remind myself that my God is stronger than me and as long as He keeps opening another door through this process I will keep putting my faith and trust in His plan for our family.
There is a lot of hurry up and wait throughout the IVF process. The final procedure was implanting our embryo. We made the decision to implant one embryo, the strongest embryo regardless of the sex. There is about a two week waiting period before you get the results.
It’s one of those situations where you want to know the outcome so badly, yet you also don’t want to know at all due to fear of failure. I didn’t think I could go through the process all over again if the results were negative. I was so scared to get bad news because I couldn’t bear to have another loss.
The day I was expecting that important phone call happened to be the same day that I was to attend an annual fallen officer memorial ceremony for Mike. I was already a little anxious and emotional because that ceremony, as honoring and beautiful as it is, is difficult for me to attend. Now I also knew in the back of my mind that at any moment I would be receiving a very important phone call that could very well turn a difficult day into a very happy one or a difficult day into an even harder one.
God’s timing is something I will never understand. I know his timing is perfect, yet sometimes is so hard to comprehend. Of all days why was would I be getting this news today?
Yet, He knows me so well and knew that of all days I needed something good to be associated with that ceremony I will attend every year.
His timing was perfect.
An hour after the ceremony I received the phone call.
My blood test results came back positive for a pregnancy. Our embryo had successfully implanted and I was officially pregnant.
The wait was over and once again God preformed another miracle in my life, in my body.
He also never fails to have another trick up his sleeve and in His plan.
The embryo we implanted was a girl.
We are having a baby girl. My vivid dream that I had 5 months after I lost Mike is starting to unfold.
David and I are so excited, so happy and so beyond amazed at how God continues to prove himself faithful to us. Our children are thrilled and can’t wait to meet their baby sister.
The ashes in my life are in piles. Big heaping piles. Yet God has been gradually cleaning up those ashes and turning the soot left in those piles into pure beauty.
Don’t lose hope in God’s plan for your life. At times it’s so hard to see any light at the end of that dark tunnel. It’s there. God will allow that light to shine through in his perfect timing.
