We all have reusable bags lying around. They are in our pantries, kitchen cupboards, laundry rooms, garages, trunks of our cars, even folded up in our purses.

Once a new way of life needing reusable bags whenever you purchase items at a store is now a habit and even the norm.

I keep a Target reusable bag in the back of my Suburban. It is not a part of the pile of reusable bags in the trunk I use at stores though. This one isn’t empty and this one I never take into stores with me.

Inside this bag is small broom-like brush, rags, granite cleaner, water bottles, and silk flowers.

Every couple weeks I take this bag out of my trunk and use all the items in it. Then, I replace the empty water bottles with full ones and take out the dirty rags to wash and put back into the bag.

Just like having reusable bags in the trunk of a car is the norm for most people, this target bag filled with unusual items in my trunk is my norm.

Every couple times I visit my husband in Heaven I take the Target bag out of the trunk. I walk with it to his headstone and place it on the ground while I throw away any dead flowers, empty out the water in the flower holder and shake out the slugs. I usually let out a little scream and jump back a little because there are always so many slugs and even spiders. Mike hated spiders. I giggle and shake my head while I use the small handheld broom-like brush to sweep off the dirt, leaves, and bird droppings. I pour water all over and wipe it down with a rag. I take out the granite cleaner and spray it all over the headstone then use another rag to polish. Sometimes I finish with replacing dead flowers with new ones, but I always hesitate if I do. I hesitate because I know Mike would think that was way too girly and tease me from above.

This is my norm.

Keeping my dead husband’s gravesite clean is my normal and has turned into a habit.

Definitely, not something I pictured being a part of my normal routine in my 30s. If you would have asked me five years ago to tell you something I could see myself doing in five years, there is no way I would have ever fathomed regularly cleaning and polishing my husband’s headstone while dodging slugs and spiders as an answer.

Do our lives really ever pan out the way we imagined? Goodness, look at the whole year of 2020. Who would have ever thought we would be in a world wide pandemic?

The point I am getting at is in all of our lives we have different norms. Norms that we did not choose or plan for ourselves, but which have become our routines, our habits. To others our norms may seem unimaginable, crazy, or even pointless. But to us they are all we know.

The items in my bag won’t look the same as yours. Whatever they may be and however you would have never imagined this norm of yours to look like God knew all along.

God knew my norm and habit of cleaning up my husband’s shoes lying around, dirty clothes on the ground, and dishes from the living room would turn into my norm and habit of cleaning up the dirt, bird droppings, leaves, and slimy slugs off his headstone at his grave.

You know what… I enjoy it. I take pride in stepping back and looking at the shiny headstone our sons and I designed after cleaning it. It’s my way of still taking care of him.

God had a plan for whatever your norm has become and will become. Try to stand back, take a look, and be proud of how you have made that norm your habit and routine.

Mike was such an optimist. Always finding the positive in any and every situation. So even if it means dirty hands, slimy slugs, smashing spiders, and bird poop I try to smile and be positive because I learned from the best.